The procedure for performing Tharpanam can vary slightly based on regional customs and family traditions. However, a general procedure includes the following steps:
Purification: Take a bath and wear clean clothes. Purify the place of ritual by sprinkling holy water (if available).
Setting up the Ritual Space: Spread the mat and sit facing south (the direction associated with ancestors). Place the plate and other materials in front of you.
Wearing Pavitram: Wear the Darbha grass ring (Pavitram) on the ring finger of your right hand.
Invocation (Sankalpam): Take some water, a few black sesame seeds, rice, and a flower in your right palm. Recite the Sankalpam, stating your name, lineage (Gothra), the date, time, and your intention to perform Tharpanam to appease your ancestors. While reciting, invoke the specific ancestors you wish to offer to (as mentioned in the previous point).
Offering Water and Sesame Seeds:Take a small amount of water mixed with black sesame seeds and a few grains of rice in your right palm.
Offer this water by slowly pouring it out through the space between your thumb and index finger (this is the Pitru Mudra).
While offering, mentally invoke the names and relationships of your ancestors (e.g., "I offer this to my father, [Father's Name], of [Gothra]"). Repeat this for the grandfather, great-grandfather, and the corresponding female ancestors in both paternal and maternal lines.
Offer water three times for each ancestor or set of ancestors.
Invoking Different Forms of Ancestors: Some traditions involve invoking ancestors in the form of Vasu, Rudra, and Aditya.
Karunya Tharpanam (Optional): You may also perform Tharpanam for other departed souls, including those who have no descendants.
Concluding the Ritual: After completing the offerings, fold your hands and express your gratitude to the ancestors for accepting your offering and for their blessings. You can also chant relevant mantras or prayers.
Dispersing the Remaining Water: Pour the remaining water onto the earth. The sesame seeds and rice offered can be left on the plate for birds or other creatures.